Mother's Day / Susan G. Komen Race

Today was Mother's Day in the US, which was a somewhat bittersweet event in the Alexanderpool household. I started the day by participating in the Susan G. Komen Philadelphia chapter's Race for the Cure event, a 5k run dedicated to raising funds for breast cancer research and women's health care initiatives with all proceeds going to Delaware Valley-area institutions. Pegs and I ran the same race when we first arrived in 2010, so to say that it brought back a number of memories would be a bit of an understatement. There were an estimated 45,000 participants this year, many of them wearing pink tags indicating that they were racing in celebration of or in memory of someone. I saw a number of women who were clearly either undergoing treatment or just recovering from it, most of them surrounded by their friends and loved ones running with them. I was happy to support the event and celebrate the fight that so many of these women were clearly winning, but I would be lying if I said that I wasn't also somewhat angry (or at least embittered) that Panagiota wasn't one of them. I found myself at the very front of the crowd of runners, and when the starting gun was fired, I took off much faster than my usual jogging pace. I was running almost recklessly, as if I wanted to get away from a guilty sense of resentment towards the happy survivors, when I saw Sofia on the side of the road with Yia Yia, Papou, Nik, Young, Alex and Eva. In a split second I remembered why I was really running, and a quick high-five from Sofia drove me to continue at the same pace through the rest of the course: not out of a sense of anger and frustration, but out of a sense of hope, love and concern for those who loved and were loved by Pegs. When I met up with everyone after the race, I asked Sofia if she knew why I had run in the race; she thought about it for a second before replying, "You ran to win, Daddy." I did indeed, and I think I could say the same for everyone who participated today. Happy Mother's Day, Pegs; we miss you.

View of the crowd at the race; May 13, 2012

After the race; May 13, 2012

Why I ran today; May 13, 2012

Why I'll continue to run; May 13, 2012

Easter and gardening

Below are a few videos from Easter 2011. Pegs was filming, but you can hear her talking about all of the things we needed to do in the garden while I "egged" Sofia on.  Sorry; I couldn't resist.  In one of the videos you can see all of the tulips that we planted earlier that spring. I've also attached some pictures of the garden, which Pegs loved so much, including the tulip bed.

Japanese magnolia, daffodils and day lilies we planted near the garage.

One of the dogwoods in front of the house.

Yellow tulips in the front bed.

The rest of the tulips in the front bed.

View of the vegetable garden and the pear and apple trees behind them.

Christmas Memories

Croix; April 26, 2008

Posted (belatedly) on behalf of Ingrid (Malfait) Guilbaud: 

I remember very well when both Pegs and I announced to the family that we were pregnant. It was at Patricia's place, where we met for one of our traditional family lunches. After a while Lee told me: congratulations for your pregnancy, we are so happy we decided to do the same! 

Although the due dates were quite different (early Nov and early Dec), Sofia decided to come to life a bit earlier than expected, and only 5 days after Louise. 

It was such a wonderful perspective to have these two cousins so close in age. Pegs and I were looking forward to see them playing together (we still have to fulfill this wish, Lee!). Thanks to our regular meetings in Lille, we were able to see them growing and changing, comparing the sizes (that was quite easy) and exchanging tricks on best ways to make them sleep full nights. As you see in the picture at right, only our beloved Bon Papa was kind (and open minded!) enough to let us change baby diapers on his own bed! 

Pegs was always adorable with Louise, playing with her, offering us to take care of her while we were eating at the restaurant at Bon Papa's place. 

If you ask Antoine about what Pegs makes him think about, quickly the word food will come in the conversation. One day we were invited in at the very last minute (about a few hours before) with some friends of ours at Lee and Pegs' and she cooked a wonderful roasted chicken. It would have taken me one week to think about it, get the ingredients and several hours to prepare it! 

I also remember that for one of the Christmases we spent in Bondues, she prepared food gifts for each of us that she made herself and presented in very nice packages. I thought it was such a nice idea to put part of yourself in Christmas gifts....as we are celebrating Christmas today, I will have a special thought about this moment in Pegs' memory. 

Click on the link below to see pictures of Pegs and Ingrid pregnant together and videos of Pegs playing with Louise and Sofia. 

Sofia's Birthday

Paris; November 8, 2009

Yesterday was Sofia's birthday, which was incredibly bittersweet for all of us. Sofia was very excited to be turning four and getting presents, obviously, but I think each of us felt Pegs' absence. We had cake and opened presents last night at Nik and Young's house, after which Sofia stayed as part of her "birthday sleepover." This morning, since I didn't have to take Sofia to school, I spent some time before work looking at photos and videos from Sofia's earlier birthdays. To mark the occasion (albeit a bit belatedly), I decided to upload a few videos from Sofia's second birthday (make the jump below to access them). You might recognize some of these from The Alexanderpools, but the others are "new" to the web. You'll note that Pegs' hair was coming back in following her chemo treatments, which had ended not long before. One year after these videos were taken, Pegs was diagnosed with her first recurrence. Less than one year after that, she passed away.

I know that I should be focused on Sofia's happiness surrounding her birthday and making sure that she continues to live her life as fully as possible, but I can't help but feel angry at how cheated Pegs was not to be able to be with us. And how cheated Sofia is for the same reason. It just makes me ... very mad that something like this could happen. And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go put my fist through a wall, eat some leftover birthday cake and hug my daughter just a little too tight. And not necessarily in that order.

Pre-Zip Lining Video

I thought you all might enjoy another video from Pegs' zip lining tour. Since we showed up bright and early that morning, we had some time to kill while we waited for the other canopy tourists to show up. Pegs decided to document our downtime by turning the camera on me and Damien and asking us a bunch of questions. The video includes a number of inside jokes between me, Pegs and Damien (including one of Pegs' favorite Damienisms, the always appropriate "That's funny to me."). As you can tell from the video, Pegs was clearly enjoying herself that morning.

Bonus: If you'd like to see footage of Sofia saying an obligatory "Wheeee" as per our conversation, click this link.

I Remember When...: Pegs Went Zip Lining

Costa Rica, March 30, 2011

After she got her first cancer diagnosis, Pegs decided to make a lot of lifestyle changes: cutting out sugars and processed foods, limiting her use of and contact with chemical products, reducing stress, etc. She even considered getting a tattoo, which was something she had never been interested in before; she later liked to joke that she had all the tattoos she needed after she got her radiation treatment markers (little permanent dots they put on to indicate where the radiation needs to be delivered each session). After her first recurrence, she was more determined than ever to implement positive lifestyle changes, and that included being open to new experiences. Little did she know that she would get an opportunity while we were in Costa Rica for Vanessa's wedding to have a new life experience that many consider thrilling, dangerous and/or nauseating. No, I'm not talking eating about the local cuisine; I'm talking about zip lining.

I Remember When... Panagiota Was Preggers

Loutsa, Sept. 3, 2007

As a number of you already know, Pegs had a pretty difficult pregnancy. She liked to joke that she didn't suffer from any of the typical problems associated with pregnancy (hemorrhoids, constipation, cravings), but she got all of the rare and esoteric ones. For example, whenever she ate anything with sugar (including natural sugars like fructose) she would swell up like a balloon. Her ob/gyn later theorized from her collective symptoms that she might be allergic to progesterone, which is one of the hormones that the body produces in large quantities during pregnancy to promote gestation. As you can imagine, being allergic to the very hormones your body is producing can make daily life a little challenging, but Pegs so looked forward to being a mother that she more than happily accepted these inconveniences as a small price to pay for the ultimate reward.

(Click on the link below to read more)

Something you may not know... about Panagiota's singing voice

I was thinking about the post that Brooke put up the other day, in which Panagiota was talking about getting me a karaoke machine for Christmas so she could watch me squirm as other people attempted to sing. It's not like I have the best singing voice in the world or anything, but there was something to be said about Panagiota's ability to carry a tune. Actually, if you watch this video from Vanessa's wedding reception in Costa Rica, nothing really needs to be said.... Enjoy!

Panagiota Video: Sofia Splat

On occasion we'll upload a video involving Panagiota for your viewing pleasure. I say "involving Panagiota" because she was rarely willing to be captured on film, but she liked to direct the action from behind the camera, especially where Sofia was the subject. In this particular video, Panagiota was filming Sofia on her playmat when our beloved daughter performed an unceremonious and somewhat frightening-looking faceplant. You'll notice that the camera barely wavers at the moment of impact; what little movement the camera makes is solely attributable to Pegs' laughter.

Bonus Something you may not know...: It seemed like whenever I would get hurt in Panagiota's presence, she would almost invariably break out into a giggle. While I would like to have believed her claims that it was a nervous reaction, I'm 99% sure that she just thought injuries were funny, especially where loved ones were concerned. I blame her lack of exposure to cartoons as a child; thankfully, Sofia won't have that particular problem.

Got your own video(s) of Panagiota that you'd like to share? Care to share your own story of how Pegs may have laughed in the face of injury? Write a new post or send us an e-mail!